Another Open Letter

Hey. 

I told myself I wouldn’t think these thoughts.  I definitely never thought I would be writing them down and putting it out there for you and the world to read.  I said, “I am strong, I don’t need this.  I can rebuild my life the way it was before you came into it.”

But I can’t.

I sit here on a Sunday night thinking of what could have been.  I am very aware that we made the right decision.  No one wants to drag out something that is over.  I get that. 

But I miss you.

I keep thinking of the good times, and yes dammit I am thinking of the hard times too.  We had both.  Ups and downs, laughs, cries, I didn’t realize how much I needed you until you were gone.

Now with this Government shutdown thing I feel like it is a stark reminder of how you aren’t here. 

We shut down.

I guess it really doesn’t matter now.  It is over. 

I know that.  I just wanted YOU to know, that I appreciate the time we had and I am glad we had it. 

At the end of the day, I guess I just don’t know how to say Good Bye.

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Damn you Vince Gilligan.  Can’t we…  I mean is there any way…

No.  I know, there isn’t any way. 

Dammit Jesse don’t look at me that way. 

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I will remember you at your happiest…

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And Walt, oh dear Walt…  I don’t even have the words.

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I am arranging my bacon into a sad face this Sunday.  😦  Wearing my purple pajamas wandering around, trying to avoid AMC, because Low Winter Sun is just your sloppy seconds and we all know it.  I can’t think of another show right now.  It is just too painful.

I am just going to chose to believe that you are doing well. That you all are.

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I see I am not alone…

 

One day, a long long time from now, I might start another show.  But it won’t be the same.  It will never be the same.  You have ruined me for all other TV shows.  I hope your happy, TV WRECKER! 

Sorry, I am just upset.  Until then, I will stalk you on the internet until I feel gross about myself. 

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I will move on. 

One Day.

 

As Always,

 

Woman on Pause. 

 

Picture Credits
http://i.embed.ly/1/display/resize?key=1e6a1a1efdb011df84894040444cdc60&url=http%3A%2F%2Fpbs.twimg.com%2Fmedia%2FBVVon1_IYAA4a7s.jpg

http://themoderatevoice.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/breaking-bad-s5-jesse.jpg

http://blogs.sacurrent.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/bitch2.jpg

http://www.beingryanbyrd.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/breaking_bad_walter_white.jpg?fd9d8c

http://www.malcolminthemiddle.co.uk/gallery/data/998/Bryan-Cranston-TCA-Awards-1-Aug-09-MITMVC-10.jpg

http://smhttp.14409.nexcesscdn.net/806D5E/wordpress-L/images/breaking-640×921.jpg

9 thoughts on “Another Open Letter

  1. You had me going there. Your heartfelt angst for……..a tv character……..And I don’t even know who he is! Now my sense of loss is great. Any thing that can instil such feeling must be worth watching.
    ‘Breaking Bad’ you say. I know one of my daughter’s raves about it. So, in the interests of research, I’m going to check him, I mean it, out.
    You will find love again. Do they do reruns? ;)x

      • I don’t have Netflix. I rarely watch TV unless I can be guaranteed it’s something I’ll enjoy. This sounds like one. I’ll find a way. ;). And you are left bereft. 😦 x

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